Sunday, April 25, 2010

Time pass....a real one...!;)


On a hot steamy day, traveling in a crowded bus becomes all the more difficult. A single vacant seat and you can find the entire crowd, trying to snatch it away by every means possible. I personally feel much more comfortable standing on such occasions…the reason being, one…I get to have my own space however meager it is, two…I don’t have to see the frown on the co passengers face, envying me…simply because I could manage to grab a seat which she couldn’t . I know some of you have raised your eye brow reading this…but this is the truth! I am too good ;-)

And on one such occasion I got a chance to exhibit my modesty and humility (I never let go such prospects unattended…lol...;)) A hefty old lady with two bags in each hand resembling her twins managed to crane into the thickly populated bus clutching on to the steel rod on the left side . And I personally felt the bus had tilted an inch to the left…may be because I had to bear the burnt of her massive weight which she felt was better to be dumped to the person nearby. This is one reason I find standing better…at least you need to balance just yourself not everyone around you (some may disagree, but for me it’s this way:-p.) With every left turn the bus took …I could very well relate my self with the fate of dinosaurs…which ended up being a cluster of fossils! And I thought its better to offer her my seat and move away in a cozier space… if possible near a window. I tapped on her flesh stuffed hands and politely rose indicating her to occupy my seat. She immediately asked me, “Are you getting down at the next stop?” I reluctantly said, “No aunty…it’s just that I thought you are finding it difficult to balance …so feel free to sit down.” The aunty was pleased leaps and bounds and with a wide smile on her face, she accepted my offer. I in the meanwhile felt I had done a noble cause helping an old lady out. But the satisfaction soon faded, when I met with the atrocities of standing in an over crowded bus. At the next stop the person sitting next to the old fat lady (who presently had my seat) got down. Obviously, everyone jumped in excitement to grab the opportunity…but the aunty didn’t allow any one to sit in there…she screeched at the top of her voice “moleeeeeeee!...vaa evide irikam!!!”(Come sit here my girl.) Everyone around her had a disgusted expression and most of them were mumbling beneath their breath…while some found it better to openly spill out their anger and some really colorful words were flying in the air(#%^&*$#). Hope you got the feel of it!

I turned to see what the fuss was all about, and found I was the scapegoat in the whole scene…the seat was being offered to me…without any further hesitation I thought it was better to sit down. The crowd was a bit silent, still a few were irritably mumbling, “this is a public property …everyone has equal rights etc etc” I thought it was better to ignore and turned to see what the aunty felt…as I turned to face her, I see her admiringly looking at me with a pleased yet false smile. I smiled back at her. She winked at me and said, “all this happens don’t take it seriously…by the way are you studying?”
Me: yes, final year M.com
Aunty: (unnecessarily impressed) oh! Wow...great, so where do you live and who all are there in your family?

Me: (confused) well…near the temple, along with my parents and younger sis.
(With every answer I gave her, I could feel she was getting overly excited and was constantly checking me out from every angle…I obviously felt awkward.)
Aunty: so you are a ‘Hindu’ right? You are ‘nair’?...do you regularly go to the temple?(with a smile so wide, even trying to attempt one would hurt your cheeks…for sure)

Me: yes, I am a ‘Hindu’ but I don’t regularly go to the temple…just when I feel like (why does she have to know all this…caste, creed, religion…yuck! I hate such people who ask all this in the first meeting…I mean what do you get from it!)

Aunty: (again stressing on my caste) …you didn’t specify.

Me: (repulsively)…Err…

Aunty: let me be frank, the thing is I have a lot of alliances or marriage proposals which would suit your profile…so if you are interested I will contact your parents (all this with the same wide shameless smile)

Me: (almost like lightening stricken)…Oh!(sheepish smile flushing every now and then)..well…the thing is…(aunty cuts me abruptly)

Aunty: yes yes...I know you are studying now…but then we have to look into such things seriously, and if you are so particular may be we can have the engagement done…and marriage a few months later or after your studies…what say?

(I really couldn’t control laughing and with a genuine laugh I said…actually aunty the thing is…I would have been interested in your proposal…but the thing is I am already engaged!!! I said so showing her, my prized possession …my ring!)
The scene after that is hard to explain and I was happy because I didn’t have to see much of it…as my stop was nearing, but I must admit it was a real time pass. I rose from the seat and bid adieu to my old friend who was yet to recover from the shock!

17 comments:

BORAN said...

Oh!!..When would i get to see some woman like that? lol

Destiny's child... said...

These aunties are a terror. Next time, think twice before these acts of Mahan-ness :p
It was funny :D

lakshmi said...

very light to the mind.........
nice one

A New Beginning said...

Hey you are safe now angel..atleast from the aunties you just mentioned...believe me they can be found everywhere..specially in weddings
:(
Great post..loved the detailed description that youve given :)

Tulika said...

:D

I enjoyed reading this.

R. Ramesh said...

very interesting and honest post..hey there r so many characters v come across in life..n thanks friend for passing by...best wishes always...:)

Unknown said...

cool yaar, its really interesting .

Lucifer said...

in a bus??? like seriously??? seriously??? un-believable

R. Ramesh said...

dropped in 2 say Hi

angel in disguise.... said...

@boran
very soon..trust me...:p

@destiny
hmmm...ill do that sissy..!:)

@lakshmi..
so u enjoyed it...? good to know that:)

@new..
very true yaar..weddings are a hub of such aunties..

@tulika
:)

@ramesh
thanks ...do keep visiting..:)

@shalu
u dropped in here..unbelievable..

@mayz
ya in a bus...that too fully loaded;)

Bikram said...

ha hahaa Lovely jubley.. nice one .. You are not going to beleive this but .. two years back I visited india and almost the same happened in AIR with me .. i had this old lady the whole time she was reciting some paath or something.. while i was having my drinks .. food came I said Non veg she was like not impressed and then the lecture started how Drinks are bad.. I mean one or TWO drinks ..
Non veg is BAD....

and all the sermons by some bhagwan ji.. THe whole flight in the end I had to get up get myself a couple more drinks and I guess then she got the HINT... :)

thankfully she did not have any rishta for me ...

but i hope u learnt from experience :)

aquarian gul..... said...

hehehe...well dat was really really interesting incident....gud ma gal..

Sh@s said...

Ha ha...that was funny. So, are you really engaged or that innocent piece of jewellery saved your day?

Ramakrishnan said...

Hilarious stuff.Throughly enjoyed this post. And travelling in a bus in India is quite a challenge. I suppose this incident happened somewhere in Kerala !

Ram

Kiran :-) said...

I believe you are not engaged :-)
See, there are not only aunties but also uncles!!

Believe it or not, there are aged people those who dedicated their remaining life for tying the knots. :-D

A few months ago, I met with a couple like that. Both retired - The uncle was a business man quite tactic, the aunty much affectionate.. Both dedicated to find a perfect match for guys and dolls in the family :-D

Nice post angel (Err.. You make a lot of people call like that! Was this blog name deliberate, you naughty!!! :-D)

angel in disguise.... said...

@bikram
lol...ur experience..is as good as mine..:)

@aquarian gul
enjoyed reading it alle...cool..:)

@shas
i am engaged..n am getting married very soon...:)all the stuff in the blog is real and not incidental;)

@ram
thanks for dropping in here...n u guessed it right,it happened in kochi...do keep visiting!:)

@kiran
hey...am really engaged..all this is not fiction..but the real truth!
seeing u after so many days...welcome back n keep visiting. well, i couldnt find a better title for this post..so thought of making it so...;)

pRasad said...

Enjoyed reading..

Still wondering about aunty's motive behind offering the seat....neways..let's leave the aunty alone :))

Nice post..