I still remember my first day at school. Clinging on to my amma’s sari and trying to hide myself from the numerous new faces starring at me, or rather I felt so…but actually they weren’t. There were so many like me, most of them ready to break down any moment … while there were others who were quite aloof of what was happening around them and were giggling and frolicking in their own world. And these were the ones who grew up to become the bullies of our class later on…lol…All this had been a nightmare once ,but now it’s all like a dream long forgotten…
Time flies ….and so has in my case too. From kinder garden to school…School to college…College to career (hopefully ;)) and many more…..
Didn’t even realize when I grew up (not that I behave like one, but at least for others). Time was like a fierce wind and I flew along with it like a broken leaf, ready to sway in any direction it took me.
Life at kinder garden would have been fun, it’s a pity I don’t remember a thing now! Same is the case with my primary classes; the only big thing I remember is my school shift…hmm…that was a painful one...to be rooted from one place and replanted in some other land! Everything was new…be it friends, teachers or surroundings. And it did take time to adjust, but who could resist the group of amicable faces, ready to accept you howsoever you are for a long time and so couldn’t I too…and ended up making friends ,who I know will last for a life time!:)
School was so much fun (I agree when I was a part of it I never felt so) in everyway. Everyday you get to meet your friends, study together …eat together …play together… fight together…and do everything ‘possible’ together! ;). No tension, no worries (I agree at times we did have teenage traumas …may be about a plump pimple on the nose or too bushy eyebrows or may be the poor marks in the class tests…we did have our troubles, but they seemed quite common and you were never left alone!). All you were supposed to do were study and score marks or rather pass! Now the things are not same anymore, you can’t just afford to get pass marks, they won’t take you anywhere and you, yourself know it. And that’s the most bitter part of it all…you know what you are supposed to do, but never try doing it…!lol…Soon after our schooldays we come to realize ,what life actually is…and it really isn’t that fun! You are no more kids and you are expected to behave like grownups ,which we seldom do…at least in my case and you get to hear lectures from your parents every now and then for not doing the same or not doing what they expect you to do! Such a case never arrived when you were a kid; you were left free to do what you wanted….scream, shout, dance etc etc…until it didn’t get on to your amma’s best friend or didn’t hurt her kids…lol…We were taken for granted as we were kids and no one really expected us to behave yourselves .But now, things have changed you have to behave as the society expects you to do or else it might look weird, and to be true it really does! Its no fun to see an adult scream around like a child does…isn’t it?. What I want to say is, as you start growing up, the various rules and regulations which are a part and parcel of our lives also seem to grow along with us. Responsibility grows, concern grows, expectations grow, dreams grow, ambitions grow….and whether your happiness grows or not all depends on the fulfillment of whatever mentioned above ;).
Life really becomes complex, you cant really fool around …you have to think about your future, your career, marriage, life ahead etc etc.(And if you have a couple of your friends getting settled either in their career or getting married ,then things really become tough!...coz your parents too try to speed up and get their responsibilities done…humph!)
And in situations like this you feel” why did I have to grow up??”. And that’s exactly what I feel sometimes…longing to be a child all over again…and relive the fun and excitement once more with nothing to worry and fret!. To be a part of my yester years where everything was so anxiously awaited …be it the summer vacation or the school reopen, everything had its own celebration …with tones of innocence and oodles of cheerfulness. Hmm…how I wish life was a swing, where you could take a deep breath and swing back to be a part of your childhood days , and swing forth to see what the future holds for you next!....all in jus a swing…!;)
